Why is the measure of love always loss?

Why is the measure of love always loss? Sometimes you never really realize how much you love something until it’s lost, regardless of what that something is; and so in the future we always measure the things of life based on what we have already lost. When you lose what you love most dearly, it makes you realize that there are so many other things in the world worth loving, things that you forgot to love; like friends, family, hobbies or even yourself. The bad things in life open your eyes to the good things you weren't paying attention to before. When we are able to regain all other loves that we pushed aside, the love we lost becomes more and more not worth mentioning. The loss of love will always be measured against new love, thought it’s hard to imagine when new love might re-appear, sometimes the loss of love is the best thing that can happen. Often times it does one of two things; it can make you a stronger person and makes you realize that the love you had was quasi blind and though it felt like love, there was always something missing. Or it can make you realize that what you had was true love and the separation pulls at your hunger pains for the companionship and love of a soul mate lost. Sometimes neither person wants to admit the struggle and deal with it until it becomes too late and sometimes the most minor event can affect everything, and when that seemingly insufficient thing happens it sets everything else in motion...the most minor event can change everything...sometimes for the better, even if it doesn't seem like it at first. There is always some madness in love, but there is always some reason in madness. No one is perfect, and therefore there is no such thing as a perfect relationship, but every so often the person that you are with may seem like they aren’t the right fit, but often times all it takes is a little work and compromise and understanding to make you realize that they are the right fit, you just have to find a more comfortable pair of shoes… because you both had grown up and didn’t fit into the shoes you started in. Unfortunately its not until they are gone that you can realize this. I think the problem with most people who act impulsively believing that they will get want they want, end up feeling guilt, remorse and invariably want back what they cant have. But sometimes, when they are finally gone, it can make you realize just how much it was never meant to be and you wasted away the days hoping that fate would step in and make a decision for you. Time can expose you to a whole new feeling in your heart, and it makes you ask the question, what was I fighting for? What was every thing I had to say, every letter I wrote? Was it your stubbornness or my own? Bottom line: it's couples who are truly right for each other that wade through the same crap as everybody else, but the big difference is they don't let it take them down. Love is so terrifying in a multitude of ways, when you have it you always fear losing it, and when you don’t have it you fear that you may never find it again. The loss of love by itself is enough to kill a man. It was once believed in the times of Shakespeare that when one sighed, it took the most vital blood away from the heart. Who is to say that one is not capable of dying of a broken heart? It happens all the time, the loss of a lover frequently drives people toward suicidal tendencies, and then sometimes the death isn’t so sudden, it is a slow agonizing death, in which, with every sigh, the heart grows weaker. We like to think that there is a good excuse, a good reason for acting the way we do when we push love away, but for the life of me I can’t really think of a good one, not for me, not for her either… Typically, symbols of love are supposed to remain strong and remain a promise and a bond between two people. Rings have always been representative of what is supposed to be an everlasting love. Unfortunately history has shown that putting a ring on someone’s finger doesn’t always mean happily ever after, but when you plan for it, you plan for a future and you give a loved one a ring and make a promise to each other, you would think that you owe it to each other to at least try to revive something that may have been lost along the way. Promise ring, engagement ring or wedding band, they are symbols of a promised love, through thick and thin. If love is worth fighting for, you stick it out at any cost, and that’s what I tried to do… but it became obvious that her affection for me was gone, and there was no fight for her, because she just didn’t care… within six weeks it became obvious that the relationship was not worth exploring, the happily ever ending that we had worked for, turned from a fairy tale to a nightmare. What happens when the future is lost? You get to re-invent yourself… somewhere along the way things changed, the stresses of life battled against cupid and in the end won, but the loss is worth measuring for yourself, not just for you both. It is the clichés of love that make it so hard to give up on. When you lose someone you thought was your future, it perpetually alters your life. You don’t just hit delete and pretend that there was nothing ever there, nothing is done quick except tying shoes and electric bills, and you never, ever, ever get over it. There will always be a piece of that love that you carry around with you forever; eventually the pain does stop, but the memories never do, there will be new faces and new love, but that wound will never be properly mended. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you, and no one else can fit it. In the end it's the “what ifs” that hurt the most… and trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you never met. What is the point of movement when movement indicates life and life indicates hope? Sometimes life really surprises you and often times it is the small things that make the biggest impression on you, like seeing an old friend and meeting new, fresh, beautiful faces, beautiful souls… and though they may live 1,000 miles away, it makes you appreciate everything, and it is a reassurance that the heart of life is good. I guess that’s the funny thing about love; you never know which way it's going. Like me: I lost love, lost the battle...but at least I went down swinging.

The Last Supper

The first thing one must do when they are trying to move on is to forget the past...Well unfortunately for me the last good food and wine experience I had came on one of the last nights spent with Megan. So I will digress a bit into the past, only because the meal we had was extraordinary. I will remember that night as one of the most memorable date nights Meg and I had of late, good food, good wine, good conversation, and well you know what comes after all that...

But moving swiftly beyond that and into the meat of this blog (no pun intended)...

We arrived at Willi's Wine Bar in Northern Santa Rosa around 7:30 finding the place packed full, but we didn't mind and enjoyed sitting at the bar. We brought with us a bottle of 2004 J Robert Thomas Pinot Noir, a single vineyard designate from the winery, and very typical RRV Pinot but with a twist; it was dark and rich with black cherry and hints of vanilla and an intriguing smokiness almost to the extent of it being some sort of smoked meat. It went down "smooth" and was delish!
The dinner was filled with an array of indulgences; we started with an arugula & endive salad, avocado, Manchego cheese, and finished with a Meyer Lemon - truffle vinaigrette. First of all, who doesn't love arugula? Spicy, nutty green of my dreams; good to eat by itself, in salad or on sandwiches. All the flavors complimented each other perfectly, you got the spicy/nutty arugula, the cleverly bitter endive mixed with buttery avocado, tangy, nutty Manchego and then earthy, tart and tangy sweet meyer lemon and truffle vinaigrette. This salad was probably one of the best salads I’ve ever ordered in a restaurant before. While we were enjoying our greens or next dish arrived, Ahi Tuna Tartare. Normally Megan wouldn't be big on raw fish, but I convinced her that it would be good. Stacked in a cylinder with pea shoots, green onions and avocado, along side home made chips to scoop with, the tuna was delectable, marinated with soy and sesame oils; a great mid course. Our server/bartender Joe actually suggested us starting with these two courses and finishing with our final two, because I had originally ordered them in a different order. I didn't realize the significance until he brought us the next two plates together; truffled french fries with parmesan, parsley & black truffle aioli and pan roasted halibut cheeks with garlic, tomatoes and olives. It was like a kicked up, glorified version of fish and chips. I had to convince Megan on the cheeks too, but once again, I knew she'd love it if she only got to try because halibut cheeks are sooooooo gooooood. The fries are incredible, fries and truffle oil were meant to go together, plain and simple. The fish cheeks, a very simple preparation, served in a small cast iron skillet, the cheeks were cooked with garlic, olive oil, tomatoes, olives and parsley I believe, simply prepared, big flavors, simply delicious, a perfect compliment of salty, garlicky, rich fish with juicy cherry tomatoes.
Unfortunately there was no room for desert, but we left thoroughly satisfied.

I apologize if this isn't the most exciting, intriguing blog ever, but it was a month ago when I ate there, being that, and recent occurrences have rendered me blogless for a few weeks, its hard to remember all the details, but I knew I just needed to get something down to get me back into a blogging state of mind.
But stay tuned I have some very cool winery visits planned that are sure to dazzle!

Temporarily Out Of Commission

Blogging will be temporarily out of commission due to a broken heart...

check back in the future when my chest isn't caving in on itself

:(

Brut Rosé

There is a lot of talk about Brut Rosé since still rosé has become a hot commodity in wine land. Pink no longer means sweet. Wine Spectator and Wine Enthusiast have both done features on rose's, and even Hollywood is hittin the pink stuff; and now Sparkling Rose have taken pink to a whole new level, giving them a sophisticated and saucy stance is the world of bubbly. They are a beautiful, fun, summertime drink. Sparkling rosé can be made in a variety of styles which makes it a very talented wine for pairing with a variety of foods.

I'll start with my favorite Brut Rosé that I have personally tried, Handley Cellars. In my opinion, this Brut Rosé kills the competition in California Brut Rose, bar none! There is a lot of international Brut Rose that I have not tried that I would love to compare, but I don't know if I could find the best selling Brut Rosé in the world, Laurent-Perrier; and at a price of around $75-$80 I don't know that I could afford such a bottle. I wouldn't imagine that there is much that could compare with Laurent-Perrier as all the grapes come from 100% rated Grand Cru vineyards. (Grand Cru, meaning "great growth," is the highest level of classification of AOC (Origin Controlled) wines from Burgundy or Alsace, though the term is used in Champagne and Saint-Émillion. Grand Cru's come from a single vineyard, and are designated for Grand Cru based on the potential for greatness because of the area in which it is growing along with the terroir. Typically Grand Cru vineyards are pruned in a specific fashion in order to cut down the yield which in turn produces a more concentrated fruit cluster). But anyway, enough about the French, let’s get back to Handley...

I visited Handley Cellars on a recent trip through the Anderson Valley on my way to Mendocino. I knew that the winemaker Milla Handley had been making some bubbles, though she is better known for her Pinot's. The tasting room was fairly large and had a very cabin feel to it, but with a mixture of Mesoamerican and African décor. They had a variety of wines to taste, and fortunately for us, the tasting room manager was around and decided to open a bottle of Brut Rosé for me, being that I was in the industry and part of a winery that makes sparkling wine as well. There was a lot of excitement among the fellow tasting room staff upon the popping of the cork, I guess it's not every day that a bottle gets opened and everyone was like a kid waiting for candy to be handed out to them. My anticipation was not disappointed...This wine is like a mélange of raspberries… like raspberry coulees with bubbles! It had just a hint of a yeasty/nutty component to it, almost like toasted almonds; overall an awe-inspiring wine...Upon hitting my palate, it danced, and sang and I think even there was a celebration with fireworks… pure rapture… I was told that Milla has cut her production of sparkling down considerably because she doesn't have the facility for it and had been doing the work at neighboring sparkling houses like Roederer Estate, who makes a fine Brut Rosé as well I might add; they're L'ermitage Rosé is a sort of tête de cuvée that is only made in the best of years, but is a totally different animal from Handley, as it expresses a more true aged "Champagne" character with hints of caramel and the fruit is full on currants while expressing a very nice creamy mouse; however it is also a bit pricey at $72, but they also make a Non Vintage Rosé that is $27, but I prefer the L'ermitage :) But as not to get too sidetracked...Handley, if you visit them, even if you don't get to try their sparkling's the Brut Rosé is definitely worth the buy and works great as an aperitif or with dinner drink, as I think it's flavors and balanced acidity along with its fine bubbles would be a great pairing with some Indian foods, and it is at a reasonable price range for sparkling wine at, $36 a bottle.

Brut Rosé are often made in a Brut style and adding a bit of red Pinot Noir to the wine before it begins its secondary fermentation, or as I said in my previous entry, they are made by adding a pink dosage (dosage being a mixture wine and sugar which is used as your sort of spice rack for sparkling wine...the best way to describe dosage is; if you have a piece of meat in front of you to cook for dinner and then there are all the different ways that you can prepare and cook that piece of meat to make it taste differently, from marinades, to barbecue sauce, to just salt and pepper, you can change that dosage a thousand or more different ways and your sparkling wine will taste different each time.) so... in the case of Brut Rosé, a heavy Pinot Noir dosage is added to give it some color as well as a more berry driven fruit profile. Handley does a four hour maceration on the skins to give it its beautiful pink color, therefore no need for pink dosage. At Iron Horse Vineyards, there is no need for pink dosage either, the Brut Rosé goes through a cold soak with the Pinot Noir still on the skins, and the color is the darkest hue of pink I've ever seen, and the results are a big wild bubbly full of cranberries and strawberries, and you actually get a kind of skin flavor from the wine that is actually quite intriguing.

Other good Brut Rosé that I have tried include, Gloria Ferrer, a light salmon colored bubbly with hints of strawberry, citrus and floral notes. And traveling back over to France Nicolas Feuillatte, also salmon in color with a bit of Pinot Meunier blended giving way to strawberry and currant notes, it is a lively, fun and fruity bubbly.

I fear that I have about exhausted the topic of Brut Rosé, but to conclude, Brut Rosé can be a lot of fun if you can find some good ones, and there are plenty of them out there; they are very versatile food wines, everything from Thanksgiving turkey, to back yard barbecue, to ahi tuna, Brut Rosé can cover a lot of ground, but my favorite thing is just to sip on some on warm evening like I did last night in celebration of my birthday...

1st Day of Harvest

It was a beautiful morning... I looked up toward the winery perched atop the hill as I cruised down Ross Station on the Vespa; I couldn't see anything, but I knew that just a few hundred feet away everything was buzzing, I could feel it, as if the buzz was sending transmissions out across the valley. I arrived at the top just in time to see one of the tractors unloading several large crinellas of grapes ready to be weighed before their immanent plunge into the de-stemmer.

I rushed to discard all my baggage, grabbed my camera and headed out. They had started picking on K and I blocks, all Pinot Noir grapes that would be used to make Brut Rose. Of course my batteries died after only two pictures. After replacing the batteries I trudged back out to the vineyards. You couldn't have asked for a more beautiful morning to start making wine; the morning sun was warm and the Mylar streams to keep away birds were glistening in the light while the jovial crew sang and whistled while they worked.

While most winemakers will make a Brut Rose by using their Brut style sparkling wine and adding a pink dosage to give it it's color, winemaker for Iron Horse, David Munksgard makes a full rose wine by doing a seven day cold soak and then starting the 1st fermentation as a rose, and 2nd as well; the result is a big wild, fruity sparkling wine that allows for a variety of food parings, my favorite would have to be a pork tenderloin with a fruit chutney or salsa on top finished with demi-glaze.

Like a kid in a candy store, my buddy Damon and I wandered around the winery immersing ourselves in everything possible. We watched the grapes come in ton after ton and get dropped into the hopper, asking questions and sampling a few along the way. The final crinella of grapes was used for the blessing; everyone, customers included dropped everything to celebrate the beginning of harvest. Everyone received a glass of current vintage Brut Rose, (of course) and David poured in a bottle of the Brut Rose into the grapes as they were dumped into the hopper, and we all yelled yay! A little less romantic as compared to many blessings; we didn't have any religious figure there to bless the grapes, but our gusto I'm sure will produce a beautiful wine in just a few short years.
There's really nothing quite like being around a winery during harvest, especially on the first day. There is just something about all the many things going on that are so fascinating. Everyone is in high spirits and as I said before the buzz can be felt from miles around, even when you walk up to the winery without seeing anything, you just get this tingling feeling that there’s something majestic happening. It is no doubt the most electrifying day for a winery as they look to the future of what these grapes will become, a magnificent wine.

Good food and good wine needs to be talked about.

The only way it could be better if I was in Italy

Upon entering Lococo’s I had a flashback to a small Italian restaurant I visited while in Paris. Nestled along 4th street in the historic railroad district of Santa Rosa, Lococo’s is small and intimate, decorated with copper bottom pots and dried peppers hanging from the walls, simple and elegant red and yellow hues are strewn across the restaurant and would you expect any less from a place called Lococo’s Cucina Rustica? Italian food is all about the family, and at Lococo’s you get comfortably cozy with your surrounding tables, close enough to smell their food and listen to various conversations. I found enthralled by the atmosphere and couldn't help but eavesdrop on a couple next to us that were asking questions to another couple at a table next to them. When our waiter Giovanni greeted us I definitely knew I was not in Kansas anymore, I must be in Europe, born in Italy, Giovanni's accent was hard to understand at first, but became more and more interesting to listen to. We enjoyed great conversation with Giovanni, and he helped us out with choosing a nice Italian red wine for our meal, but I would actually like to start with dessert before I delve into the complexity of the Nero d’ Avola that that I chose. I have no words to describe the cannoli here, a light casing that the chef actually makes with wine as part one of the ingredients, the filling is light but subtly rich and tangy with candied fruits mingling inside with pieces of pistachios. After searching through the thesaurus for a good word to use, I found none that do justice; you simply must try the cannoli. Moving right along... the wine, one of the most important parts to a good Italian meal…Their wine list is simple, a great selection of Italian wines, and a decent selection of domestic wines, I chose a glass of Nero d’ Avola after Giovanni brought us a taste of both that and a Tuscan blend to try. Nero d'Avola is one of the most important red wine grapes in Sicily, and is one of Italy's most important indigenous varieties. It is named after Avola in the far south of Sicily. Treated similarly to Syrah, many believe that Nero d’ Avola may be a cousin of Syrah, with dark fruit, nice hints of pepper and spice with succulent tannins. I wish I could remember the producer, but I do remember the label was attractively decorated with roses. Finally moving on to dinner… The food has a Northern Italian and Sicilian influence, and why not, the owner and Chef Joe hails from Sicily. My lovely and beautiful girlfriend Megan ordered their daily special of ravioli, filled with asparagus and ricotta in a butter and sage sauce. The ravioli where ginormous and the portion was large as well, but they were very tasty. I was in the mood for a pasta dish, and though the menu contains a variety of traditional Italian meals including Osso Bucco with a saffron risotto, chicken marsala and veal saltimbocca with prosciutto, mozzarella and sage. Though they all sounded marvelously appealing, I decided on tortellini alla romana; tortellini with peas and prosciutto in a cream sauce, it was delicious and rich and paired nicely with the Nero d' Avola. Appetizers are simple and traditional as well, including calamari fritti, bruschetta and carpaccio. Our extraordinary server Giovanni checked in on us regularly, swapped wine talk and made our stay all the more enjoyable. We left stuffed, satisfied, happy and with money to spend for a movie, because despite the outrageous food, there is no outrageous cost, you could stuff yourself silly and drink copious amounts of wine at Lococo’s and not have to worry about the bill, entrees range from $10-24 and the portions are generous. You’ll leave feeling as though you just spent the evening dining at your Italian aunt’s house with all the family there too. There simply isn't a better place in Santa Rosa for Italian food then Lococo's, and they could easily compete with some of the best Italian spots in the Bay Area.

Mangi Bene!

Good food and good wine just needs to be talked about....

Something to be said about Pommard Clone Pinot

Being my first ever blog entry I thought it fitting to start with a new love of mine, Pommard Clone Pinot's.

Since Sideways pushed Pinot into the forefront of everyone’s wine mind, I decided that I should start to examine the craze that is Pinot and see if I could jump on board because Pinot just has not been in my repertoire of bottles because I have yet to find one that can knock my socks off. So I've spent the past year or so in search of my style of Pinot and I eventually stumbled across the Pommard Clone... There is definitely something to be said about this difficult and delicate grape; despite being genetically unstable, difficult to grow and ferment and tricky bottle-aging, Pinot's stand out as a diamond transformed from coal. Pinot's can range from being big and bold with dark luscious fruit and earth components, to a lighter, delicate, feminine pinot. Like the Audrey Hepburn of Pinot Noir, the Pommard Clone is something that I have fallen in love with; hints of strawberry, cherry and tea leaves, smooth and velvety, perfectly elegant while still being intensely powerful. If the Pommard Clone was capable of riding a Vespa around Rome, I don't think we could be a better match made in heaven. The Pommard's that I have had have been the oh my god wine's that have made me the wine aficionado that I am. Everyone that has ever become captivated by wine has had that one wine that has just sends them over the edge and separates them from being a wine fan and a wine fanatic. Pommard Pinot's are that wine for me; 2004 Iron Horse "Q" Pinot Noir from Green Valley is fantastic, Pommard and Geisenheimmer clones making a beautiful wine; don't think about going to look for it, it's all gone, as the production is only around 50 cases, but keep you're eye out for the 2005 Vintage to be released sometime this year. But if you're looking for good alternates, Thumbprint Cellars 2005 Pommard Clone Pinot from Russian River Valley is equally extraordinary. Also check out Marimar Estate Pinot's, specifically the Sonoma Coast Pinot, but they blend Pommard into most of their Pinots along with some Dijon, Swan and Cristina clones. There's definitely some good Pommard's coming from Oregon and the Santa Barbara areas, but my next quest is to go directly to the source of Pinot, Burgundy France... (Well not physically, really I'm going to do some research, and go to Bottle Barn and see if I can't find a good French Pommard)

Good food and good wine just needs to be talked about.